Jeremiah's School of Levitation

Well, the Republican Warmongers can be smug and warm in the fact that, indeed, the war protesters were DEAD wrong. This was most definitely NOT a war for oil.


In other news, Denise Richards, or as she's known to me, "Super Sunshine Baby" is accusing estranged husband, Charlie "Never Had No" Sheen of being, generally, an asshole. Among other things, he threatened her life and shoved her around. He's now been slapped with a restraining order, saying that he must remain 300 feet away from her, which, for me, would be a good thing for my health because if I ever came within 300 feet of a living, breathing Denise Richards, I will suffer some nervous system dysfunctions that will rob me of the knowledge of the English language, cause me to lose control of my knees, and cause me to emit a barely audible screech for upwards of two minutes.

In light of these accusations of shoving Denise around, I can only say this: put 'em up, Charlie. Jeremiah gots somethin' for ya. And, it ain't an invitation to a Beverly Hills party. Of course, I'm willing to take on anyone who shoves around women.

And, if the accusations are not true, I still think Charlie needs a whoopin for walking away from that lady. I mean, day-yam, that's DENISE FREAKING RICHARDS! Didn't you see her in Starship Troopers, Charlie? You need to rent that DVD! How can anyone possibly even move under the influence of those eyes of hers? How can you leave her presence unless you're being towed away by a Hummer? How can you even formulate the word "leave" when she's looking at you? What kind of monster ARE you?

These Hollywood "partnerships" bug me. They don't make no sense. They seem awkward, albiet glimmery and smiley, at the start, get weird in the middle and somewhere in there, a true sin is committed and a baby is born, and then the marriages flare up and burst like a garlic-flavored, industrial-strength belch. I think we should start giving Academy awards for Hollywood marriages. Awards like Best Impersonation of a Good Hollywood Husband, or Most Ingenuine Smile of Marital Bliss On The Cover of People, or other clever ones that I'll think of at 3 am.

So, anyway, Denise, Super Sunshine Baby, you know who's got your back, right? You know who's seen Starship Troopers enough times to actually wear out the DVD? And, you know who won't ever say "leave" in your presence because I won't be able to get within 300 feet of you anyway? Yep, Sunshine, that's right, your Jeremiah-HotWire! Yez-ma'am!

As for you, Charlie, meet me out by the flagpole after class. And, don't bring no friends...

Y'know, if Charlie ever gets within 300 feet of me, I'll kick his ass so hard he'll be able to see his buttcrack out his belly button. Once a slimebag, always an asshole.

I take it you saw her in one of the Wild Things movies?

What? HOW could you have MISSED that?

Mona: Come join me on the Ass-Whoopin Side, Mona. Together, we will kick him into the galaxy!

Serra: I didn't see Wild Things because I generally have time to watch only one movie per quarter, and it usually is something involving claymation or the word "Pixar", but I have seen a bunch of the promo stills of Wild Things, as I have with other Denise movies. Those Wild Things shots nearly struck me blind. She is SO awesome. (I'm banging my head on the wall now...).

Everyone needs a famous person or two to go ga-ga over... Mine's Keanu Reeves... sigh...

By the way... Your fascination with Denise Richards reminds me distinctly of another Blogger-Budddy we lost track of a while back... You're not the long-lost, much beloved, E.M. by any chance, are you?? ;-)

by jove, she guessed it!

so glad you are back... :))))